It wasn't the heartburn, dry-mouth, garbage truck, headache, or 6am charley-horse that drove a stake through the heart of my morning REM cycle.
No, it was my hangover shame.
My--- oh my god I scared my roommate, screamed at my ex-boyfriend, lost my bike key, booty danced in a nearly empty bar, ate a bowl of spaghetti with my hands, and left a sobbing message on someone's voicemail ---shame.
I woke up today with puffy eyes, a paralyzing sense of dread, and a new Facebook friend.
Friends, I know you have all been there.
Please take a moment to share with me your (favorite!) moments of hangover shame so I don't feel so much like a twenty-six year shit stain.
Or don't, whatever.
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3 comments:
i threw up in a hallway of a dorm once and cock blocked my friend emily. as the vomit left my mouth, that's when the hangover first started. (that's why this story applies).
the booty dancing part sounds nice. i tried to make out with a dude behind a curtain in the middle of a toga party. i had a boyfriend at the time with the same name as the dude. i later threw up in my bed, also one time i woke up on the floor in a hallway and did not know how i got there. partying is tight!
ugh don't even want to give too many details but includes making out with two douches at the knockout...
oh also a few weekends ago when i got really drunk at my friend's wedding, i put two plastic candles in my dress to look like light up nipples.
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